Thanks - a - giving......

There are days....

There are nights....

There are struggles....

There are battles....

There are tears....

There are lumps in the throat...

There are jumble thoughts in my head....

There are questions....

And I know I won't get the answers.....

And if I did get the answers would I still listen to them....

I don't know why....

I don't know how....

When I can feel so low, so sad, and so so alone, that I can still love you.....

I'm trying so hard.....

I'm trying so so hard.....

I don't want to go out....

I don't want to do anything....

I just want this hurt to go away....

I just want this pain to go away....

I have so many things I want to say....

And I can't, all I can do is sit here....

I know this will get easier....

I know it will stop at some point, but I don't get it...

Am I that stupid? Or do I just thrive on this sadness??

I don't want to be sad....

I wish I could be mad at you...

I wish I could just turn off my heart.....

And on that note, I wish I could turn off my brain....

Just stop thinking....

Thinking of you...

Where you are....

What are you doing....

Are you with someone new?

How can one gal cry this much....

It will be better...

It has to get better....

It will get better....

One day at a time...

And I will get there....

They say what it's how many months, for how many years??

Oh boy....